Are you there? I need to know what happened.
Sure. It started with a long walk and a begging bowl. Then it was time to sit.
I have some questions.
Who doesn’t? For answers, consider impermanence, inevitable extinction.
Yes, got it! To everything there is a season. A time to––
But don’t hold onto the idea, or any other. No more T-shirts or bumper stickers, okay?
Right. I’ll try to focus on action. How do I give?
Without counting.
What about appearances?
What about them?
Never mind. Let’s get to the real teaching. I’m ready.
What you learn isn’t supposed to be a trophy, but a raft.
Okay. Let’s talk fortune.
Give it away. What did I just tell you?
Right, right. Okay, what about this stream? How do I enter?
What stream?
Um, like the path––you know, the levels?
Forget about those.
You say that a lot. What should I remember?
Only teach.
But I don’t know anything!
There you go.
But seriously. I can’t even control my mind yet.
Hah! Which one? The past, the present, or the future? None of them are made for holding.
[sigh]
Can you just give me some answer?
Fine. But I’m about to lose service here. The reception in these mountains is terrible. Ready?
Yes!
It’s–––
Hello? Hello?
***
This morning, I learned that on this day in the year 868, a copy of the Diamond Sutra was printed in China, making it the oldest known printed book. Prior to this, the teachings had long been conveyed orally. Naturally, I got to imagining an attempt to convey urgent teachings orally via cellphone. I have spotty service at home and pretty good service in most other places, so many of my conversations have at least a few moments where one or the other party is saying, “Are you there?” or “Wait a minute, I’m walking outside. I might lose you.” I consulted Burton Watson’s translation here.