say the word

in the dark times, singing

Three weeks ago, I met a daughter, just out of rehab, tattoos on her face.

You don’t get tattoos on your face so young and so beautiful unless. You don’t get those without knowing what it means to be taken from all knowing and collapsed into container for taking the pain as it comes from the strangers who come from a place from which memory has long been erased and every effort made to replace its former volume with desperate force. It doesn’t take so much imagination to understand what happens to girls in desperate places.

She was gentle and frightened and I sat with her in solemn awe, I see you, daughter, and now––here. I could offer only space and calm (no, I didn’t have the wifi code, none of us did) and said what I could about the possibility of story, to take the stuff of before and bring it before the fire of pen on page, fingertips on keyboard, voice taking stage before the formerly silent self, to sing brokenness back into being. “I like this,” she said, “I need more of this.”

It was days between losing and marking the loss to a system of regulations in the name of keeping safe and I nodded my acceptance when they told me as I imagine she may have, eventually, after they took her away––even through boiling rage against another senseless day in the wake of so long breaking–––meaning to maintain devotion to the hope for an ordering hand, coming where waiting feels like a looping prayer, Say the Word.

May she find that word, or it find her.

Author: Stacey C. Johnson

I keep watch and listen, mostly in dark places.

9 thoughts on “say the word”

  2. Alz Gusta Presents – Alex Gust was born in Spokane, Washington in 1974, the only child of Auri Gust and Bill Spencer. He was raised by his mother, Auri, from the time he was one years old. He has written several screenplays, Blaze, The Unworthy Ones, The Case of the Misophonia Revenge, and The Break Fast Track with his wife, Angela Gust. They went on to make these into short films on YouTube under their production company, Alz Gusta Presents. His areas of focus are suspense, dark comedies, poetry, and women’s empowerment. While growing up, he witnessed the struggles of his mother in a misogynistic work culture and how she has overcome these obstacles. Because of this, he focuses on stories that deal with womens burdens and he aims to shine light on their triumphs in the face of such adversities. Additionally, growing up with dyslexia made learning to read difficult. However, he sees this as a gift that provided him with a different way to see the world. This is reflected in his writings. He lives with his wife in a small town near Olympia, Washington. Alex continues to craft screenplays, as well as poetry. He also spends time creating oil paintings, acting at local community theaters, and making short films with his seven grandchildren.
    Alz Gusta Presents says:

    I am rendered low to the blasting furnace. These words, like shrapnel, tore through my heart. Deftly written! I wonder if her story is not so different than yours, Stacey. “The fire of pen on page,” hints at a device for deliverance. Baptized in the fire.

    Reply
    1. Alz Gusta Presents – Alex Gust was born in Spokane, Washington in 1974, the only child of Auri Gust and Bill Spencer. He was raised by his mother, Auri, from the time he was one years old. He has written several screenplays, Blaze, The Unworthy Ones, The Case of the Misophonia Revenge, and The Break Fast Track with his wife, Angela Gust. They went on to make these into short films on YouTube under their production company, Alz Gusta Presents. His areas of focus are suspense, dark comedies, poetry, and women’s empowerment. While growing up, he witnessed the struggles of his mother in a misogynistic work culture and how she has overcome these obstacles. Because of this, he focuses on stories that deal with womens burdens and he aims to shine light on their triumphs in the face of such adversities. Additionally, growing up with dyslexia made learning to read difficult. However, he sees this as a gift that provided him with a different way to see the world. This is reflected in his writings. He lives with his wife in a small town near Olympia, Washington. Alex continues to craft screenplays, as well as poetry. He also spends time creating oil paintings, acting at local community theaters, and making short films with his seven grandchildren.
      Alz Gusta Presents says:

      😥

      Reply
  3. Jeff Cann – Jeff Cann lives, works, writes, and runs in Gettysburg Pennsylvania. His essays and stories have appeared in the Good Men Project and Like the Wind magazine, as well as various blog sites dealing with the topics of mental health and running. Jeff is married with two children. When he isn’t working, parenting or writing, he can be found hiking or running the wooded trails surrounding Gettysburg. Jeff’s two books, “Fragments – a memoir” and "BAD ASS--My Quest to Become a Back Woods Trail Runner and other obsessive goals" are both available from Amazon.com. A growing collection of stories can be found on his website at https://jefftcann.com.
    Jeff Cann says:

    I’d like to read this in the form of an essay (or if fiction, a short story). It resonates with me but it’s too cryptic for me to fully grasp. I learned at my last organization, a domestic violence nonprofit, that very young women with tattoos on their faces have often been trafficked.

    Reply

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